why I'm not buying a new phone

1. I cannot afford one. I was only able to buy my last two expensive phones because I had a way bigger paycheck than I do now. Now, I can't buy a phone. Well, maybe a cheap one. And even then, I bet have other things I'd rather buy than a cheap phone.
2. I really liked my old phone. The way I use it. The way I can text on that keypad and everyone else had the hardest time. The way it looked, how nice and shiny it is and it didn't look like a toy the way some 3650s do. The way it sounded when it messaged me. I did say I get attached to things that belong/ed to me. These things are the hardest to replace. Buying a new phone, a cheaper not as pretty phone, is like getting stuck with the regular 20 hour ISP Bonanza prepaid cards after the promo of the 30 hours with free internet from midnight to dawn had ended.
3. I'm pissed at the idea that if I want a phone immediately, I should go to the bargain places to get a cheap phone. I'm thinking some of these bargain places get their phones from the jerks who follow unwitting backpackers around and take their phones from them. It may be a slight chance that I buy a phone acquired from the people I currently hate the most on this world, but I don't even want that chance to exist.
4. I'm shaking myself from my phone dependability. I was thinking just a few days ago that I really didn't need a phone. The most it did really was be my walkie talkie to the love of my life, at the time of the snatch, I had around 150 messages in it from him. I miss the instant accessibility to my lovey. I might buy a phone someday, to regain that instant accessibility, which I really miss. But it's too soon and I don't want it to be like a drug and I need some crazy fix.
5. I'm punishing myself. I lost too many phones already. I let my guard down for a short walk and look what happened. I'm still kicking myself in the butt.

Actually, generally, I'm okay. I'm thinking how mightily stupid I am but I'm okay, I'm not devastated. The hardest thing about it was to tell my mom what an idiot she has for a daughter. She's always the one who takes it (losing cellphones) the hardest.

And, this may sound strange, but sane at the same time, I am happy. I just lost my 3650 but not even that is big enough to get me down. Can you imagine how happy I am right now? Even I have absolutely no idea. It's that huge.