the whipping girl, unabridged

I am not the boy in the plastic bubble. Though I wouldn't mind, were I a boy; both Jake Gyllenhaal and John Travolta are hot.

Before I tell you the problem, first a little backgrounder that you might need. I have spent most of my life teaching at that studio on the weekend. I didn't go to a dance festival in China with the other dance majors because I had to be in the studio. I don't go anywhere actually on the weekend, I diligently stay at the studio, where I work my butt off. I don't go out Friday nights so that I can go home early and wake up at 6 and be happy teaching my 8 o'clock babies class. That studio on the weekend is my life.

This is the problem. When things go awry, I am to blame because I am the eldest and the one who's supposed to command responsibility. So even if I did all the things I needed to do, because there is dissension in the ranks, it is I who has to drop and give him ten.

And so, I am then accused of being selfish, inconsiderate, uncooperative. Somewhere along the way, I manage to point out that it's really not me who screwed up. And then, bam, case in point, my doing stuff on the weekend. I have the entire Monday to Friday (till 9pm) to do what I want, why do I have to include the weekend as well? Why do I have to plan to go to the beach on a weekend, never mind if I had planned to leave after I was done with my work in the studio? Why do I have to go out on the weekend at all?

But, like they said, I have the entire week to myself, to do what I want. I saw Blade Trinity tonight (technically last night) and would be in love with Ryan Reynolds if I wasn't already so in love with somebody else. Who told me that no matter how bad things get, there will always be more good so that the bad won't matter. Ryan Reynolds and his new abs don't stand a chance.

(But let me just say that if you're wondering if you should see Blade Trinity, go see it if you like high action vampire movies and to see Jessica Biel kick ass. Even if you don't like all that stuff, go see it anyway, if only for that scene where Ryan Reynolds is chained to the floor, shirtless, kneeling helpless yet glib in front of Parker Posey, who's slapping him around, all dolled up in stilletos and fangs. My mouth watered, eee.)

I'm okay. I'm not feeling like the world's most loved daughter right now, but I'll live. There's more good than bad. I saw some of that tonight and I'll see more of that in the coming weeks. Yay for me!